Are you single and feeling frustrated because you have not found your soul mate or even someone you want to consider having a relationship with? Are you stuck in a rut and find yourself doing the same thing every week and still expecting different results? Or even worse, are you doing not much of anything but still wondering why you have not met that special someone? The number one reason you are still single is because you are doing the same thing and expecting different results and becoming frustrated. This frustration can lead to a negative attitude, which will show up every time you meet someone new and will keep that person from wanting to get to know more about you. It may be time for you to look at your expectations and your attitude toward dating. Perhaps you need to learn how to date in order to date successfully.
What can you do different in order to have a different outcome? It has to start with your attitude and beliefs. Take the time to explore any beliefs you have about “all men/women.” Do you have some that are not serving you well? Do you have unresolved issues or feelings regarding a past relationship? If so, it is time to let go of these beliefs and the past. If you feel you need help with this, it might be time to contact a counselor or coach to help you.
The best attitude is one of confidence. It is important to let go of expectations other than to meet new people and make new friends. Enjoy the journey toward your future with that special someone, knowing you will find them.
This is also a good time to expand your horizons. Instead of just dating, go out every day looking and feeling your best! You never know who you might meet. Talk to people everywhere you go. Get out more. Join a new group or spend time at the coffee shop, bookstore or gym, or join an online dating site. Get together with friends and have fun. Maybe invite friends over to your house or meet at your favorite place. Instead of just meeting the same people, invite new people to join you. You never know when the right one might be there or might know someone to introduce you to. Remember to flirt and have fun, even if the person you are talking to isn’t someone you want to date. Don’t take things too seriously. Get to know more people as friends. Sometimes as you get to know someone better, all of a sudden you see them in a different light.
While you are waiting for Mr. or Miss Right to come along, create a life you love. Take this time to figure out what you really are looking for in a relationship. What are your relationship requirements? Someone who is happy and passionate about life is the most attractive and alluring person in the group. You will stand out among the rest. This is the best way to attract someone into your life.
For more information you can read my previous posts, “Keys to Successful Dating,“ “Are You Ready for a Relationship,” and “What to do Before Your Next Date.” So, go out, try something new, flirt and have fun and meet as many new people as possible. Remember, if you would like help navigating the dating maze, contact me to schedule a free strategy session and learn how to end your dating frustration!
Lori Ann Davis, MA, CRS
Certified Relationship Specialist