Passion: What is it and why is it important in our lives and relationships?
I have been thinking a lot about this word lately. It has always been a concept that I like to write and talk about. Recently I was asked to do an interview on a podcast talking about passion and relationships. As we get closer to February and our thoughts turn to love, it seems the perfect time to revisit one of my favorite topics.
Let’s start with some definitions. The dictionary defines passion in this way:
intense, driving, feeling or conviction; ardent affection; strong liking or desire for some activity, object, or concept; sexual desire; an object of desire or deep interest
I asked some of the ladies in my Facebook group what passion means to them and here are their thoughts:
Something that gets your heart racing, something you’re just so in love with that nothing could replace it.
Something that allows you to get so carried away in the moment that it almost feels like time stands still.
Something that lights you up inside.
Something that drives you.
What is your definition of passion and what role does it play in your life and relationships?
Many people think of intimacy or sex when you mention passion, especially in the context of marriage or dating. Passion can include intimacy, but it is more than that. For me, passion is a strong desire or emotion; a zest for life that fuels action. Passion is energizing. Feeling passionate about anything fuels more passion, even in other areas of your life. Passion is essential in attracting and a keeping love in your life.
In my work with singles and couples, I see so many people walking around void of passion. Their thoughts are focused on the past. They are afraid to be open and vulnerable. They are carrying around angry and hurt. Even though they may be justified in these feelings, they are still being drained of energy. If you see yourself in this description, it is time to find that spark of passion again and learn ways to keep the spark going for you and your relationships. Research has shown a definite link between passion, a happy love life, and overall relationship satisfaction.
I mentioned earlier that passion is more that just intimacy and sex. What does passion look like in a relationship? It is a desire to be close to someone, to spend time together, a strong sense of attraction toward one another. This can include sexual desire, but it is more that just a physical attraction. It is an emotional connection as well. This is what we often think of when we think of the beginning of relationships, or the romantic love stage. In the beginning, we have chemical reactions that help us feel passion for another person. To me, true passion comes when those hormones start to wear off and true love sets in. When you can feel passion for the other person based on really knowing and loving them, not just on an initial hormone reaction. In relationships, we must work to keep passion alive. If you allow your time together to become routine and your relationship to run on auto pilot, you can lose the spark and the passion.
How do you add passion to your life ?
- It needs to start with you whether you are single or in a relationship. It starts with self-love; you can’t feel passionate if you don’t even like yourself.
- Using positive affirmations is a great way to lift your vibration and energy level.
- Do something you enjoy. Take time daily to add small things to your life that bring you pleasure. Enjoy a hot bath, favorite music, …… Don’t put off things you like, enjoy them today.
- Try something new!
- Be spontaneous
- Get out of your head and into your body more often. Take the time to enjoy physical pleasures.
- Add more flirting to your relationships, new ones and existing ones.
- Find ways to smile and have fun daily!
Passion is a skill that brings a whole new level of vitality to your life and your relationships. It includes the thoughts you think and the actions you take. It requires you to step out of your comfort zone and try new things. Just get started!!! Passion breeds more passion, so once you begin it gets easier to continue.
How can you add more passion to your life and relationships?
Do you need help getting started? Reach out and let’s schedule a time to talk.
Lori Ann Davis, MA, CRS