The first step to finding love is to create a life you love. This may sound like the opposite of what you are imagining. You imagine that your life will be fulfilled when you find the love of your life.
Why wait to be happy until you find a partner when you can be happy now! Putting your life on hold only leads to dissatisfaction. Creating a successful life that you love helps you attract love into your life. It is the Law of Attraction after all. Unhappy people attract other unhappy people and that probably isn’t what you want. You make better choices in a partner when you are satisfied with your life. You don’t fall into the dating trap of hoping someone else will fix your problems and make you happy. This only leads to poor choices and keeps people in bad relationships.
Being single is a wonderful opportunity to learn more about yourself and what you like. Being happy while you are single teaches you that you are responsible for you own happiness. This is an important lesson to learn to not only attract but keep a loving relationship. When you focus on your own happiness, you will learn to love yourself more which ultimately helps you attract someone who will love you too.
This doesn’t mean you have to spend all your time alone. Being single is a great opportunity to explore new hobbies, discover new interests, make new friends, and take time for yourself. Get out of your comfort zone and meet new people and go new places. Change your daily routine and surroundings. Is there something you have always wanted to do but have been putting off? Now might be the perfect time. Surround yourself with other positive people to interact with. You might even meet someone along the way that you can add to this new fulfilling life you are creating.
Being single is a perfect time for self-reflection. What do you love about yourself? What do you need to work on to be the partner you want to be in the relationship you want to create? Become aware of any negative thoughts, beliefs, or patterns holding you back from finding love. This might be the perfect time to hire a relationship coach to help you sort through all of this and make some changes.
Be careful not to focus too much on the past or the future. Don’t fall into the trap of reminiscing about the past or beating yourself up about past mistakes. It is positive to dream about the future you desire and look forward to achieving that goal. Just be careful not to feel bad that you aren’t there yet. Spend some time dreaming about your future and feeling how good it feels to be there. This is part of drawing your future to you. Then make sure you spend most of your day enjoying the present moments. Don’t wait to enjoy life. Living in the now and appreciating the small pleasures and gifts is the best way to create what you desire. Keeping a gratitude journal and writing in it daily is one way to keep that focus.
Now go out and life your life, enjoy what you have, and create new experiences while looking for the love of your life who will join this amazing life you have created.
Lori Ann Davis, MA, CRS
Certified Relationship Specialist